A little game of 20 questions…

Remember that amusement park ride where you went around in circles, slowly at first and then progressively faster and faster, switching directions halfway through, daringly lifting your arms off the lap bar while riding over arches just steep enough to cause your stomach to flipflop, all set to music as the ride operator-turned-DJ spun the hottest tracks of the summer?  Maybe you slammed your knee into the car on a turn. Or lost your newly purchased “(insert random beach city here)BP” hat as the ride whipped you around backwards. Or maybe you just lost your lunch.  It didn’t matter. You ignored the laundry list of warnings plastered all over the fencing while you not-so-patiently waited your turn.  And if you were vertically challenged like me, you mastered how to inconspicuously tiptoe right by the “You must be this tall” sign. No matter where you were on the boardwalk, carnival or fair, you could hear the music from that ride blaring and you just had to go check it out. And if you weren’t fortunate  (or brave) enough to ride it, you still stood and watched for a while, tapping your foot or shaking your tush to the beat.

Now imagine handing over your tickets and taking your seat as the DJ starts spinning a mashup of Kenny Loggins’ “Danger Zone,” Rihanna/Eminem’s “Monster” and Katy Perry’s “Dark Horse” with a little Psycho shower scene sound effect thrown in? Can you envision it? Maybe you’re amused. Or a little frightened.  Or just plain nauseous. Either way, you now have a pretty good idea of what it’s like to be inside my brain most days.

So grab your hat (or your Dramamine) because you just got a free ride – I kinda know the operator.  Post a question in the comments to this entry and once I have a fair amount, I’ll do a new post with the answers.  And since there’s always that one dummy who causes the ride to be halted mid-song, please remain seated and keep your hands in the car at all times, Or just don’t be an asshole.

31 thoughts on “A little game of 20 questions…

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  1. If you had $5 million dollars and couldn’t spend it on yourself what would you do with the $$????

    John
    Charlotte, NC

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  2. You are obviously very open and comfortable about your sexual desires (which is awesome, no judgements from me), but there are many who believe that being a multiple divorcé, single mother with a (hopefully) active sex life as being something less than societally acceptable. How do you handle the criticisms and stigmas that people put out, if you’ve experienced them?

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  3. What characteristic of a guy makes you weak in the knees? Which makes you immediately walk away? Is there one that makes your heart say yes, even though your brain says no?

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  4. You get a lot of comments about the sexy pictures you post online. In your opinion what constitutes a good or welcome comment and what type of responses leave you rolling your eyes or worse?

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  5. Can we just snuggle up on the couch and watch cheesy romantic comedies with your favorite wine and just enjoy each other’s drunken company again?

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  6. You use a lot of metaphors in your writings.

    Do you find this blog to be a good avenue for your self expression??

    Is it an emotional safety valve??

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  7. Real question. Why get mad at guys that throw themselves at you when you taunt? Obviously your hoping for a reaction, not understanding why you’d be OK with one reply, but not the other.

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  8. How do stop the urge to want to beat the hell out of these ignorant people that ask you stupid questions? You have the right to post whatever you want and then people think it is OK to say obscene things to you. Do they forget that something people do/ say are not things that should be said to anyone, let alone a lady?

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  9. Will the full contents of you Dropbox ever be shared publicly? (Wishful thinking!!)On another note, on your Snapchat you post a lot about music. What was the best concert you’ve been to? Who do you want to see live next?

    John – Arkansas

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  10. I’m not sure what kind of law you practiced previously, but I’d love to know what your thoughts on jury nullification are!

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